Guest Post: Family-Shaping Relationships and A Giveaway!

I am so excited to tell you that today’s blog post is brought to you by Sierra & Faith of Winks and Eyerolls! These lovely ladies are two beautiful sisters who share a blog. They are incredibly close and love to share about fun fashion tips, recipes, DIY projects, and the journey through parenthood as a first time mom. Because there are two of them, and they both have unique life moments, I asked if they would do two blog posts for me. So, you will be seeing them again next week! The reason I asked them to share two posts is because one sister is married and the other is dating. I knew many people would benefit with something from either side. So, today we are going to hear from the married sister! These girls are both equally sweet, and I know they would LOVE if you stopped by their blog! (Be sure to keep reading, because they are offering some great giveaway prizes at the end!)

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FAMILY-SHAPING RELATIONSHIPS

Family

FAMILY, we all have one. It’s one of those things we just don’t have a say about. We can’t pick and choose our family, God does that for us. Sad to admit, there were times I questioned God about the family I was born into. It used to be what seemed like a perfect childhood at the time, but things changed. To make a long story short, my parents divorced the summer I went away for my freshman year of college. I am the oldest of five siblings and while sorting through my own mess of emotions, I knew I needed to be strong for my sister and brothers. I thought being older a divorce wouldn’t affect me as much, but I was wrong. With my parents being married for over 20 years, there was no clear implication that something was wrong. As I was starting to date and learn about my own relationships, I could see how my thoughts of couples and marriage shifted. Please don’t get me wrong, my parents are not bad parents. They were loving and supportive to all of us and still are to this day. However, the course of their relationship has greatly affected my views on family life.

So what can we learn from an unfortunate circumstance? After a lot of praying and getting over bitterness, I decided to take a different outlook on my family’s situation. Realizing that no family is perfect, I needed to be thankful for the family I did have. I needed to separate trying to play being a second mom to my brothers and sister, and act more like a big sister (that’s something I still continue to work on). I decided to stop taking things out on my husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) and appreciate him for the loving man he is. I needed to work on my relationships with my friends (I let some of them falter as well) and realize that just because my family felt like it fell apart didn’t mean that had to be the outcome of all of my relationships.

Now let’s fast forward to the happy things. I am so blessed that God chose my husband to share life’s journey with me. He truly is one of the best things that happened to me. Watching him with our son makes me fall in love with him all over again. Now as a first time mom experiencing a love that is almost indescribable, I try to focus on the positive influences my parents instilled in me and change the negative ones. It isn’t always easy and I don’t know if it ever will be. Putting my trust in God to guide me over the hurdles when I start to have a woe is me day has been the biggest help. Romans 12:12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

I know that in His timing God has a plan and a purpose. I can’t help but wonder, was the divorce of my parents a way to help us five kids realize the importance of strong relationships? I don’t have the answer to that, and I might never know. What I do know is I want to provide a household of love and encouragement for my family. I want to be the best parent I can possibly be to my son (I still have a lot to learn and I continue to learn every day). I want a relationship of love, trust, and communication with my husband. Regardless of the daily chaos and our attention being focused on our son, we continue to take time out for ourselves. We are the foundation of our family and without us being on the same page, that foundation can crack. I want to set an example to my son of what a strong husband and wife team looks like. As a family, when those trying times arise, I want to be able to work through them together and grow closer and progress towards the mother and wife God destined me to be.

Regardless if you are a child, someone who has gone through a divorce, or incredibly blessed with an amazing family, I want to encourage you to try and look at the positive in every situation (my husband is better at doing this than I am). I know it can be easier said than done. If you have any bitterness or anger try to let it go. Once I was able to do this, it made a world of difference. Try to surround yourself with people who are a support to you. Good friends can be hard to come by, cherish the ones you have.

I also wanted to share with you a recent book that I read for my book club, Balancing It All by Candace Cameron Bure. I have not been asked to promote this book nor am I affiliated with Candace. It is just a good read about faith, family, purpose, and finding the balance in it all. I want to thank Lydia for allowing the opportunity to open up and share with you. We look forward to expanding our blogging friends.

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winks and eyerolls

These beautiful ladies are also offering some prizes for a giveaway! Enter for a chance to win a copy of “Balancing It All” and a $25 Amazon gift card! The giveaway ends 11:59 p.m. on Wednesday, July 30. The winner will be announced on July 31 via Facebook and Instagram and will be emailed. If the winner is not heard back from within 7 days, a new winner will be announced.

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  • Bailey

    Family absolutely influences my view on relationships. My parents are divorced too, so I sometimes find myself being bitter about relationships.

    • Thank you for taking the time to read our post. We definitely understand where you are coming from with being bitter. Try to focus on the positive things about relationships so you don’t hinder yourself.

  • Family definitely shapes my view on relationships – both for good and for bad!

  • Raker Eldridge

    Due to abuses and problems in our lives, my husband and I went for counseling for years. I saw too much good in him to just throw away our marriage. It was worth fighting for. Now, I can see in my children’s relationships the same determination with their spouses. It isn’t easy and sometimes divorce is necessary, but I would recommend fighting for the relationship whenever possible. Thank you for sharing your story!

    • Thank you for reading our post! I agree, working through things should always be the focus. Yes, there are situations where divorce may be necessary but there are a lot of people who don’t even try. Thank you for sharing your story and that’s so encouraging to hear the determination in your children as well.

  • Valerie Atlantamomofthree

    I really do think that the family you were raised in can have an effect on your future relationships. My parents stayed together through a lot and I think it’s one of the reasons I kept going even though my marriage became rocky.
    Btw, I love Candace and would really enjoy her book, I’m sure! 🙂

    • Hi Valerie! It’s so great to hear your parents example of working through things helped you in your marriage. Candace is great and we enjoy reading her books 🙂 Thank you for reading our post.

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